Change is inevitable. Have you ever wondered why change is so stressful for many of us? Even good transitions are stressful. It is fear of the unknown and adjustments to our day-to-day lives which cause the stress and both good and bad change all need adjustment. Also if we encounter situations or events that are not consistent with our core beliefs we experience levels of stress. Our brains expect most things to stay as they are. The earlier we learn something in our lives the harder it is to change. That is why children are more adaptable to change as they have less of a ‘legacy’ to overcome whereas our beliefs are more ingrained.

We also seek out people with similar beliefs to us to reinforce our thinking that we are right; whether or not we actually are. Our brains practice loss aversion and therefore convince us to stay in situations we should move on from. Others around us will do the same as we have found like minded people and we therefore see it as a threat to our beliefs if someone close to us begins to consider change.

Also, at some point during the change process, there may be some regression and we often fear that this will become the permanent state.

Providing our brains with enough safe change allows it to learn there are benefits from change and fear reduces.

Embrace the unknown and practice change. Be kind to yourself and allow yourself to feel whatever you do and then move on.

It is possible to thrive in periods of change. ‘Who moved my cheese?’ by Dr Spencer Johnson is a simple parable that reveals profound truths. It is used by individuals and great corporations to inspire individuals and co-workers to embrace change. It shows how we can anticipate, monitor, adapt to and ultimately enjoy change by looking at change through the eyes of four characters.

We need to consider that change can be as much about the process as it is the result. We need to remember that we are able to adapt what we are doing and we can change our minds. Goals can change and adapt and failure is a part of learning and moving through the process. It is not a destination.

But what are we fearful of?

Fear of the unknown

Fear of failure – we experience self-doubt about our abilities to succeed.

Fear of success – sometimes we fear success as we are scared of how powerful and successful we can be. We are not always used to recognising this in ourselves

Fear of loss – we may lose friends or family as we embrace change

Fear of upsetting others – friends or family as we put our needs first

Fear of leaving what we know – stepping outside or comfort zone takes us back to fear of the unknown
Change is inevitable, it’s how we view it that counts. Think of it as a upgrading software or the latest version of an App.

Remember it is an adaptable process and the more we embrace and experience it, the less fearful we will become.